


Ink and Cross Become Taco Kings

by Nerdofallkinds



Category: Undertale
Genre: Crack, It was not my turn for the braincell, M/M, Swearing, why did I write this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-01
Updated: 2019-09-01
Packaged: 2020-10-04 19:17:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,004
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20476196
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nerdofallkinds/pseuds/Nerdofallkinds
Summary: Ink comes up with the idea to become the taco kings. What will happen along the way? Betrayal? Romance?





	Ink and Cross Become Taco Kings

**Author's Note:**

> This is... probably the dumbest thing I’ve ever written, and I doubt I’ll ever be able to top it. Enjoy!

“Cross. Cross I have an idea.” Ink said, as he suddenly appeared from nowhere.

“...what is it?” Cross replied, who had managed to grow accustomed to Ink’s shenanigans.

“Tacos.” Ink said, making a clapping noise, with his fingers together, and thumb point upwards.

“I like where this is going-“ Cross said, being a self proclaimed taco maniac.

“We’re gonna steal ‘em.” Ink said, as a strong believer of the phrase “be gay, do crime.”

“Can’t you just make tacos with your paint-“ Cross said, it being his turn with the braincell.

_“We’re gonna steal ‘em. And then we’ll be the taco kings.”_ Ink said, who was already the king of gay, making this potentially an issue of power.

“I see no way that this could possibly go horribly wrong!” Cross said. Clearly his turn with the braincell had ended.

“That’s the spirit! Now c’mon, we’re gonna go steal from Blueberry!” Ink said, raising his fists into the air for no reason.

“Hooray, breaking and entering!” Cross said, doing what Ink was doing, because he already agreed to this tomfoolery, he was going all the way.

_~Meanwhile, at wherever the heck Blueberry lives after all those shenanigans with Error~_

Blueberry was sleeping, like any normal human being at however late it was. Except Blueberry is a skeleton monster, not a human. But he was asleep, being very normal. However, things were about to be a lot less normal, as Cross and Ink climbed in through one of the windows.

“To the fridge!” Ink exclaimed, pointing one hand in the air as ran the fridge. He gripped the handle of the door and violently swung it open, revealing several containers of leftover tacos.

“That was extra. I love it.” Cross said, being fully onboard with taco theft.

“How many can you carry?” Ink asked. There were a _lot_ of tacos.

“Uh. Let’s find out?” Cross said, holding his arms out, preparing for Taco-Tetris.

Ink began stacking the tacos.

“...29. 29 tacos.” Ink said, a number which was definitely _not_ a reference.

“30 would be excessive,” Cross said, these numbers still not being a reference to anything.

“We need a palace. For the tacos.” Ink said. He really wanted to be a taco king with Cross, for which a palace was necessary.

“Well, my universe continues to be an empty white void, which was destroyed by a murderous human who haunts me like a ghost, and the most respectable way I can imagine filling the hole left behind is a taco palace.” Cross said. Although the text may sound agressive, a lighthearted joke with a close friend would actually be a suitable replacement.

“...heck yeah! Taco palace!” Ink said, creating a portal back to Cross’ au.

As soon as they returned, Ink began work on the palace, and Cross began eating the tacos.

_~Meanwhile, at wherever the heck Blueberry lives after all those shenanigans with Error~ _

_~(again)~_

Blueberry woke up. At 6am. Because he’s a <strike>maniac</strike> responsible human being with a decent sleeping schedule. He went to his fridge, to get his breakfast of choice: tacos. However, instead of being greeted by tacos, he was greeted with broken glass and ink stains. Blueberry sighed. “This, _again?”_

_~Now, we return to our chaotic dumbass protagonists!~_

“I have finished the palace!” Ink said, throwing his paintbrush, which exploded in the background.

“And I have finished eating the tacos!” Cross said, having eaten 29 tacos (because 30 is excessive).

Ink and Cross starred at each other for a moment.

_“Cross.”_ Ink said. He was displeased.

“Yes?” Cross said, his turn for the braincell still not coming again.

“We’re out of tacos.” Ink said, clearly not amused.

“...steal more?” Cross said, finally realizing his mistake.

Ink smiled. He was amused now. “To Taco Bell!”

_~Later, at Taco Bell~_

“Okay, here’s the plan: I cause a distraction, you steal the tacos!” Ink said, being an expert in distractions.

“I can’t stealth.” Cross said, as he was incapable of stealth.

“But I can distraction.” Ink said, being the most chaotic being in the multiverse. “It’ll cancel out, we’ll be fine.”

Ink burst into the front door of the Taco Bell, kicking it down.

“HELLO!” He screamed. “I DEMAND YOUR FINEST TACOS!”

“Dear god, another crack head?” Said the young Taco Bell employee, sick of the shenanigans that occur at this time in the morning.

“It’s like this everyday. You get used to it.” Said the older employee, their eyes glazed over.

Cross snuck in the back door while Ink was being loud. He began to grab as many tacos as he possibly could. While he was doing this, he managed to set off some sort of alarm, which was in a way, impressive, considering the complete lack of alarms in this Taco Bell.

The two Taco Bell employees turned to Cross.

“...are we gonna get fired if we let him leave with the tacos?” Asked the young employee. They really didn’t care about tacos, huh.

“Legally, they can’t, but... loopholes.” Said the older employee, who hates the fact that it’s the truth.

“Well fuck. Drop the tacos, I can’t lose this job.” Yes, they are a millennial.

“You’ll never take me alive!!” Cross shouts, running as fast as he can without dropping the tacos.

“Why are you running? Just teleport?” Ink said, making sense for the first time in his life.

“Oh. Yeah.” Cross said, actually listening to Ink, despite the fact that most of his ideas are less than good.

Ink and Cross returned to their palace, and filled it with the newly stolen tacos.

“It’s perfection.” Cross said, admiring the tacos.

“Yes... yes it is.” Ink said, his gay little mind distracted by Cross. “Cross?”

“Yes?” Cross asked, turning towards his incredibly gay friend.

“Will you be my taco king?” Ink asked, as if he hadn’t already been talking about the two of them being taco kings.

“...of course, you incredibly gay nerd.” Cross said, despite the fact that he was also an incredibly gay nerd.

And then they made out.


End file.
